4. Stationary Store Loiterers
This group is for people who enjoy spending time in expensive stationary stores and not buying anything. Occasionally we’ll sniff the paper, too. I’m sure with all the time we spend aimlessly loitering, we may be mistaken for a very nervous flash mob, but that’s a chance I’m willing to take.
3. Work-From-Home Social Coterie
When you work from home, sometimes at three in the afternoon when you’re having an animated conversation with your stove, you’ll realize that it’s the first time you’ve spoken aloud all day. This group will help those people regain their role in society — through baby steps, of course.
2. Quiet People Book Club
A book club for people who suck at voicing their opinion in the middle of a boisterous discussion and don’t get a chance to pipe up until their idea is no longer relevant. Meetings will probably only last five minutes, as once a person talks, they are not very likely to speak again.
1. The Clean Lint Filter Taskforce
One of the simple pleasures in life is cleaning out the lint filter of a washing machine. This league will visit laundromats and revel in the beauty that is peeling that long strip of lint in one fell swoop. We’ll also collect stray buttons, change, and socks and donate them to the March of Dimes foundation.
