4. Mediocre Math Skills
Chua stresses how important it is for Asian kids to be the best at school, and my parents felt the same way. I got straight A’s, took piano and ballet lessons, and didn’t complain about not owning Jncos. But then I plateaued in junior high, as that was the highest point my math and science skills would ever reach. My parents gave Chua a run for her money when it came to tiger-parenting, and I spent many hours locked in the guest bathroom, reading and hiding from them. Over time, they decided that I would always be mathematically inept, and they left me and my B minuses alone. Despite this, I was one of the few people who went to art school and strove for straight A’s.
3. An Ideal First Born
The previous idea was greatly helped by the fact that my sister gave my parents everything they wanted: good grades, good extracurriculars, and good overall genetic composition. Chua wasted a lot of time trying to fix her second-born, and my parents somehow knew better. Also, this is hardly limited to Asian families, but it’s easy to get away with things when you have a stellar older sibling. My sister went to medical school and stapled people’s skulls shut, while I got to go to art school and took classes on Harry Potter and digression. My sister is a much better person than me.
2. Texas
There was never a big deal over dating and marrying non-Asians in my family. In junior high, my sister’s walls were plastered with every famous white dude from the 90’s (minus David Koresh). My parents don’t just love being American; they love being Texan. They have no problem dating outside of their background since they have adopted so many different cultural staples. Chua had to hide her Jewish boyfriend from her parents for two years. When I introduced my parents to my then-boyfriend who happened to be Jewish, they were more concerned by the fact that he was so skinny. They’re still Asian through and through. (They will beat you with a slipper if you cross them.) But they took to Texas so well I can’t imagine them living anywhere else.
1. The “Accident”
Chua talks about the first generation of immigrants working hard jobs to give everything to the second generation, who get better jobs and still uphold some of their standards — but as parents, they tend to be more lenient. Thus, the third generation is the “lost” generation. My parents seemed to morph into second-generation parents over time, but my brother (who is seven years younger than me) seems to have eluded the third-generation curse. He’s freakishly smart and socially well-adjusted. My parents give him plenty of freedom, and yet, he has never gotten anyone pregnant. Could he be the Übermensch that Nietzsche spoke of? Anyway, I think tiger mothers are great for instilling motivation in lazy kids. Lots of people should have one when they’re young, but once puberty hits, the tiger mother’s days are numbered.
